Mother letters | Will you remember her?

mother letters mama and judah

Dear Mama,

Did you know that Mothers Day is around the corner?

Of course you do.

Like me, you’re hoping for a “surprise” house cleaning and a glorious sleep-in. Perhaps breakfast in bed?

mother letters mama and baby on a swing

You’re hoping to be Queen for a Day.

You’re hoping your labor of love and daily sacrifices and long hours and sleepless service and hard, hard work might be acknowledged in a way that will make your mama-heart go flutterflutterflutter, I. am. seen.

And I hope that for you too.

Your love runs deep. Your reach stretches far. Your presense breathes safe. Your work speaks holy… and so you deserve to be honored, oh Mama-Queen for a Day.

mother letters baby kissing mama

But this year, as you prepare for the day that’s all about you

Remember her who has no babies to embrace.

Remember her who has experienced loss in the womb or loss in her arms.

Remember her who reluctantly entrusted her heart-in-the-shape-of-a-child to someone else’s care because, at the time, it was the highest form of love.

Remember her who is separated through deployment or assignment or illness or disease.

Remember her who aches in her soul while her baby is in prison.

Remember her who has waited and counted and worn her knees ragged praying for the day when those two stripes would appear.

Remember her who loves our babies because she’s not yet found a man to give her some of her own.

mother letters mom holding baby

Remember her who burns with regret for letting go when there seemed no other way.

Remember her who parents alone, with those sweet littles still too young to form the words “I love you” on their lips.

Remember her who waits in agony for applications to be approved and a judge’s ruling telling her what she already knows. (That she, too, is a mother.)

Remember her who’s broken-hearted from being pushed away by a wayward teenager.

Remember her who lacks access to the kind of medical care we take for granted and instead waits in fear of her birthing day.

Remember her—in a far off land—who pushed to her death, while delivering life into the arms of the world as she said hello-goodbye.

mother letters mom and toddler doing make-up

And you, dear Mama-friend…

Your surrender is noble and your service is seen in the heavenly places.

You—who are so like God himself in your creating and nurturing and laboring and the handing over of your very glory to anotherwill you remember how precious the privilege of doing what he does?

Will you remember that your children, your role, your name—Mama—is not something you’re entitled, but something released to you as a gift?

Your gift—the one you give and the one you receive—is far sweeter than any that could be packaged up and wrapped with a bow this Mothers Day.

mother letters mom breastfeeding baby

Happy Mothers Day to you, Mama.

May you be celebrated, esteemed, and affirmed in your joy. May you wake up that sweet Sunday morning to reviece your beloved hand-drawn cards.

And as you do, may you remember her, and whisper a prayer for her too – the one who is unable to share in your joy.

(And please, for the love of all that’s good, may you also receive your breakfast in bed and a tidy house as you undoubtably deserve. And flowers, many flowers!)

Love,
Another Mama Trying to Remember

mother letters mom with sleeping baby

 

Dear friends, last Mothers Day my husband was away in Papua New Guinea on an outreach. Pregnant and alone I lamented internally about how my one-year-old couldn’t give me the Mothers Day I “deserved.” There would be no sleep-in, no breakfast in bed, no house-cleaning service, no flowers, no finger-painted card. “How miserable and sad”, I thought to myself. And then I began to think about the mothers in rural PNG where 1 in 7 die in childbirth, never even getting to hold their babies in their arms. It put things into perspective for me. Fast. That’s where Bloggers for Birth Kits was born out of – my mopey pity-party turned reality check where I decided that life was bigger, and more important, than my “perfect” Mothers Day fantasy. Click here if you’d like to read more (or watch the video) and find out how you can make a difference for one of these precious mamas by making a clean birth kit (which costs around $2).

 

This post is part of the Mother Letters project. Read them, mama-friends, and find nourishment for your soul.

mother letters image

 

 

About Author

Adriel Booker is an author, speaker, and advocate based in Sydney, Australia who believes storytelling, beauty, and the grace of God will change the world. Adriel has become a trusted voice in areas of motherhood and parenting, Christian spirituality, and global women's issues. She's also known for her work with the Love A Mama Collective—serving under-resourced women in developing nations through safe birth initiatives—as well as her years spent as a Bible teacher and leadership coach. Her latest book is Grace Like Scarlett: Grieving with Hope after Miscarriage and Loss and she's made the companion grief journal available for free. Find Adriel across all social media platforms at @adrielbooker or sign up for LoveNotes, Adriel's 'secret posts' that aren't published anywhere else online. ✌️

22 Comments

  • Stephanie
    23 April 2012 at 11:13 pm

    Now you have made me cry a little bit!

    My aunt and uncle lost their last baby a month after she was born. Although they have three other children between them, I am sure their hearts ache often from the loss of the one.
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  • Melissa
    23 April 2012 at 11:14 pm

    Beautifully written.
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  • Eleanor
    24 April 2012 at 12:17 am

    I am not a Mum, it is one of my dreams, a longing within side me.
    You expressed those words so well.
    That was a beautiful post – There were tears!

    Reply
  • Krystle
    24 April 2012 at 2:13 am

    Such a great Mother Letter.
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  • Nessa
    24 April 2012 at 4:15 am

    Tissue time – your words are so beautiful.

    There are so many different “mamas” out there… I remember the Mother’s Day that we were still trying to make me a mom… after 16 or so months. I have never forgot that feeling – the wanting – but also feeling so glad to be celebrating my own mom and knowing that she missed hers so badly. and how very blessed I am.
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  • Alicia
    24 April 2012 at 4:48 am

    Such a beautiful post!! I know with this current pregnancy I have felt more physically sick and tired then with my last one but I have tried hard not to complain to much about it. I know in my heart there are so many women who I’m sure would take my morning sickness and all just to experience the pregnancy and growing life of their own little bundle of joy.
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  • Rachael
    26 April 2012 at 9:14 am

    On Mother’s Day, several years ago, I had a young child ask me if I was a mommy. I answered, “yes, I just haven’t had my kids yet.”

    Now that I’ll be halfway through my first pregnancy this Mother’s Day, I feel a little uncertainty about whether or not I’ll be celebrated by my husband and community as a Mom this year.

    Reply
  • Krystle
    27 April 2012 at 3:04 am

    This is fantastic.
    My Mother Letter was written to a Mom who has been struggling with secondary infertility, and it’s always important to think before we speak and to remember others.
    While it’s great to celebrate this special Mother’s Day coming up, we should never feel entitled to be selfish and I think it would be so easy to do that and not remember….thank you
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  • […] a part of the Mother Letters project, I wrote Will You Remember Her? about women who struggle with joy. Here’s an excerpt: “You—who are so like God himself in […]

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  • pamela t.
    15 May 2012 at 1:28 am

    Adriel,
    Thank you so much for commenting on my site. (when I saw it, I gasped, thinking, (gasp) it’s her!!!) :0) It was a sincere pleasure and honor to link to your article posted on (in)courage. Reading your article honestly made me take a sweet, holy pause and think reflectively and prayerfully about what Mother’s Day meant for other women and I really appreciate that. As I said, it was a great way to start my Mother’s Day. Your sentiment stayed with me all day and I had to let others in on it! So happy I found your site today. Looking forward to exploring it and getting to know your heart and ministry through your words. Many blessings on you and your family.

    pamela t.

    Reply
    • Adriel Booker
      15 May 2012 at 9:23 pm

      Oh Pamela, you are too sweet. 🙂

      I’m so glad I could help you celebrate Mothers Day well, by remembering that there is more to the day than just being spoiled. (Though I do hope you were spoiled a wee bit too.) x
      Adriel Booker recently posted..i’m a mom. and i am perfect.My Profile

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  • Angela
    22 May 2012 at 3:27 am

    My friend, Hannah, sent me a link to this post because she thought of me. I’m the Momma waiting and praying for almost two years for those two lines to appear. I’m the Momma who is loving on other people’s kids/babies as a nanny. I am the wife of an amazing man who will be an excellent father one day. I hope people remember him, too, on Father’s Day coming up.

    Thank you for your kind words.

    xo,
    A
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    • Adriel Booker
      28 May 2012 at 10:12 pm

      Oh Angela, your road is difficult! Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability here. You are such a gift to those children you love and care for. I hope (really hope) that one day soon your own lines will appear. Thank you for loving beyond yourself as you graciously wait.

      (And how thoughtful your friend to remember you the way she does.)

      love,
      A
      Adriel Booker recently posted..the birth that went according to plans | plan your best birth (part 1)My Profile

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  • […] wrote this letter for you: Mother’s Day for those who have lost or are longing. Please know that we remember you and believe you deserve to be celebrated, […]

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