We know the deep pain of losing a baby. We also know there’s no blueprint for parents to know how to grieve or commemorate their baby’s life after miscarriage, stillbirth, or other forms of pregnancy and infant loss. It can be confusing and disorienting on top of the sorrow. We sometimes feel misunderstood or unsure if our grief is too much or not enough. Sometimes we hardly know what we feel other than heartbroken.
Our prayer is that this ecumenical remembrance service will provide you space to grieve with hope whenever you find yourself in need. Within the service is time to lament, time to reflect, time to honor your baby, time to receive comfort from Jesus, time to give thanks that we’re not alone, and—most importantly—time to hope.
Please set aside forty-five minutes (or a bit more if you want to sit in reflection through the beautiful music at both ends), and prepare to light a candle together midway through the service.
We hope that as you watch this service from the privacy of your own home or with a small group or other gathering, you will feel a sense of solidarity with other bereaved mothers, fathers, family members, and loved ones across the world. We see you. We honor you.
Along with our wonderful team of contributors from five different nations and two indigenous nations, it’s our joy to serve you in your loss.
Adriel & Ryan Booker
Gadigal Land—Sydney, Australia
ORDER OF SERVICE
Adriel & Ryan Booker
Acknowledgement of Country
Aunty Sharon Minniecon
Scripture Reading—Lam 3:19-24
“I remember my affliction.”
Validation of Grief
Dr. Mekel Harris
Scripture Reading—Ps 42:1-3a, 5, 7-8
“My soul longs for you.”
Original Song—You Can’t Break Me
Scripture Reading— Ps 139:7-12
“Where can I go from your presence?”
Scripture Reading—Ps 118:1-7a
“His love endures forever.”
Excerpt from Grace Like Scarlett
Prayer of Saint Francis before the Crucifix;
Candle Lighting & Moment of Reflection
Original Song—Come Be You
Becca & Chris De Souza
Prayer for Mothers
Prayer for Fathers
Scripture Reading—Mark 10:14b-16
“Let the little children come.”
Prayer for Couples Struggling to Conceive
Scripture Reading—Is 43: 2, 3a, 4a
“I am with you.”
Prayer for Families & Relationships
Prayer for Moving Forward
Erica M. McAfee
Scripture Reading—Rom 8:35, 37-39
“Nothing can separate us from God’s love.”
Benediction & Closing
Adriel & Ryan Booker
Bronwyn Lea @bronleatweets
Quantrilla Ard @quannyboo
Chris De Souza @desouzamusic
Ashlee Proffitt @ashleeproffitt
Kelly Streiff @kelly.streiff
Elise Takashima @elisetaka
Sarah Philpott @sarahlphilpott
Erica M. McAfee @ericammcafee
Clint Watkins @clintdwatkins
Becca De Souza @becca.desouza
Anna Kettle @notesonlifebyannakettle
Dr Mekel Harris @drmekel
Rachel Lewis @rachel.thelewisnote
Casey Parnell @caseyparnell
Maria Furlough @mariafurlough
Tanya Riches @teeriches
Peyton Lauderdale @gathering_hope
Ryan Booker @ryanbooker74
Adriel Booker @adrielbooker
Ryan and Adriel Booker have been in vocational ministry for more than twenty years. Their passion is to help people discover the goodness of God, understand who they are in light of God’s care, and find their place in the world to help their communities flourish. Adriel is the author of Grace Like Scarlett: Grieving with Hope after Miscarriage and Loss and also the host of Our Scarlett Stories pregnancy loss community and Deep Dive peer support groups. She’s also the founder and host of Tethered—a gathering for those exploring the intersection of grief, faith, doubt, wholeness, and hope. They live in Sydney, Australia and have three children in their home and four in heaven. Find out more at www.adrielbooker.com.
Maybe your grief is fresh and raw and you’re still reeling from the suffocating blow of a recent miscarriage. Or maybe you’ve long ago buried a secret grief, but something within is probing you to lean in closer to the pain once again. Grief is wild like the sea, but it doesn’t need to destroy us. We can’t conquer it, but we can navigate it, and we can find Jesus there too. Grace Like Scarlett will not explain away your pain, but it will help you see God’s invitation to be formed afresh in him. Grief can undo us, but it can also remake us. Let’s lean in together.
© Adriel McIntosh Booker 2020
Please feel free to show the video replay of our remembrance service for any event as long as it remains free for attendees. If you would like to use it as part of a paid event, you must first seek permission.