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The world needs more good men

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I’m not just raising boys… I’m raising men. Good men.

raising boys to be good men

Dear Boy Moms,

Raising boys can be tiring.

They are loud. They are dirty. They are busy. They are active… very.

But don’t we have the wonderful privilege of raising not just boys… but raising boys to be good men?

The world needs a few more good men.

This is the type of man that I’m hoping to raise:

Men that will treat women with the utmost value and who will respect their opinions and rights and bodies and intelligence.

Men that will serve others and not just want to be served themselves.

Men that will look out for the underdog and use their strength to help those in need.

Men that will not be afraid to give hugs and hold hands and help strangers and high five kids for kicking a great goal (even if they are on the opposing team).

Men that will know what it means to share in keeping house and home.

Men that will have conviction and backbone, sensitivity and tact.

Men that aren’t afraid to cry when they need to.

Men that will have faith and follow-through and strong values and noble priorities.

Men that will make great husbands and fathers and employees and bosses.

Men that will know they are special and can change their world if they have the right motives and friends and inspiration.

Men that will be both confident and humble.

Men that will be tough and men that will be tender.

Men that will work hard and rest well.

Men that think sports and sewing and cars and cooking are all good and noble pursuits, regardless of the “gender” typically assigned to those different tasks (and countless others).

Men that will understand that to become a husband and father is the greatest privilege and also the greatest sacrifice they will ever make… and the one that will reap the richest reward.

Men that will fill their family’s love banks to overflowing even if their bank accounts are dried up.

Men that wisely know when to uphold tradition (hello, Christmas!) and when to break the mold and adopt a new way.

Men with solid beliefs who have the courage to live them out.

Men who are kind and men who are loving.

Men who will know when to be captains and when to be cheerleaders.

Yes, boy moms, isn’t that the type of man you want your boy to become too?

Lofty but possible. Possible, I know, because I’ve just described my husband.

Much love,
a boy mom trying my best, just like you xx

Note: In case you missed it, this is the follow-up to my post about dealing with gender disappointment during pregnancy when finding out I was having a boy (and why I love being a “boy mom” now). Apparently (judging by your comments) many of you can relate…

Dear friends, how about you? What sort of men do you want to raise? And girl moms, what type of men do you want us boy moms to raise for your daughters?

 

best buddies: #6 of my 52 fotos project.
Linking in with other Project 52ers: Styleberry Blog and Courtney Kirkland.

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14 Comments

  • Reply Branson 12 February 2012 at 9:28 am

    Absolutely loooove this post, girl! I am studying the book of Jeremiah and thinking about how I want to raise a boy who has both great compassion and courage like he had to have had to follow God’s will with tasks that weren’t easy! Such good stuff! :)
    Branson recently posted..Wild Wonderful Wordless WednesdayMy Profile

  • Reply Laura 12 February 2012 at 2:02 pm

    Every time you post I think….did I write that? I’m reading a book now called “That’s My Son” that you might like! It’s all about trying to raise godly men….definitely something I didn’t realized I was called to do but wouldn’t change for anything!! :)
    Laura recently posted..Looking for JoyMy Profile

    • Reply Adriel @ The Mommyhood Memos 19 February 2012 at 10:25 am

      thanks for the recommendation!

      and yeah, funny how we sometimes “stumble” into things that we never knew/understood that would be so important for our lives!!

  • Reply Motherhood Without A Map | ifthisismotherhood.com 13 February 2012 at 4:01 pm

    […] thinking about this post by Adriel over at The Mommyhood Memos. She made this spectacular list of what kind of men she is raising her boys to be. I’ve never thought about it quite as deeply as she did I guess. I mean I knew that I wanted […]

  • Reply Nessa 15 February 2012 at 9:49 am

    Beautiful and powerful words… you are growing some amazing little men.
    Nessa recently posted..Our ValentineMy Profile

  • Reply melissa rohr 17 February 2012 at 2:52 pm

    love love this post! the world needs more good men, that is something that scares me so bad if i were to have a boy. my ex husband was such a horrible person that it really scares me how ‘wrong’ it can go! i think if you go into it knowing what you expect of yourself though, you can raise perfect little guys :)
    melissa rohr recently posted..wordless wednesday: when the sun comes out.My Profile

    • Reply Adriel @ The Mommyhood Memos 19 February 2012 at 10:28 am

      yeah, i can see how that would scare you. i’m so lucky to have a great husband that i *hope* my boys will copy!! but you’re right, even as mothers we can teach them so much if we are deliberate about it. i really think that having goals, thinking longterm, and being intentional is the most important thing. (rather than just sailing through parenting with no game plan. know what i mean?)
      Adriel @ The Mommyhood Memos recently posted..rock-a-bye mama (he loves me different)My Profile

  • Reply Courtney Kirkland 17 February 2012 at 5:24 pm

    Love this post. Love, love, love it. I think that’s why I was not in any way disappointed in having a son. The world most definitely needs more men…more GOOD men of noble and worthy character. And these two? They are just precious!
    Courtney Kirkland recently posted..Feature Friday: A Bold GraceMy Profile

  • Reply Snips & Snails and Puppy Dog Tails « The E is for Erin 29 February 2012 at 2:04 am

    […] did also recently read a piece on raising boys that I adored, over on the Mommyhood Memos. Adriel wrote about what kind of men she wants her boys to become, and she said it so beautifully: […]

  • Reply Ken Kern 30 June 2012 at 7:01 am

    Hi Adriel,

    I’m a first time grandpa. My grandson Haidon is soon to be four years old. I’m trying to be a better grandfather to him than I was a father to his mom. I’d add two lines to your recipe for a man. We’ve got to be great teachers. And we’ve got to stand always for the Truth.

    • Reply Adriel @ The Memos 30 June 2012 at 10:08 am

      Oh yes Ken, I just LOVE those. My husband is naturally a wonderful teacher and I adore watching him teach our children things. And Truth, yes, Truth!! I hope my boys will grow up learning both of those things.

      I think it’s so special to watch grandparents with their grandchildren. You have a lifetime of parenting and perspective behind you now so of course you’ll be an even better grandpa than you were a dad. I think that’s how it should be. We should keep getting better with age, right??! 😉 I bet your grandson is so lucky to have you. Thanks for sharing your insight – I couldn’t agree more.
      Adriel @ The Memos recently posted..a weekend in the most beautiful city in the world (sydney, australia)My Profile

  • Reply Bonnie P. 5 June 2013 at 1:59 am

    I stumbled across this today and absolutely love & agree with all of it. As a single mom of twin boys, I feel it’s vital to teach them how to grow into well rounded men, husbands, and fathers. I am lucky to have my brother & father to help me ‘teach’ them.

  • Reply Kay Trotter 23 August 2014 at 4:58 am

    Love this. Thank you for writing it and helping to guide moms of little boys towards being Godly men and spiritual leaders of their homes.

    ~ Kay
    Kay Trotter recently posted..You can help prevent suicideMy Profile

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