Oh fair Nap Time, where art thou?

Dear Nap Time,

I hate you. No, I love you. No I hate you. Where are you?

It seems not that long ago that I had a sleepy newborn that was actually not so sleepy. Don’t get me wrong – he was an amazing sleeper at night and I was one happy momma about that. But Nap Time, you were nowhere to be seen.

And we had a major Nap Time-shaped-hole in our hearts.

Then, after some searching and woo-ing and very hard momma-work, you came bounding into our lives at two months old.

You came, you cooperated, you made my sweet boy happy. You made him alert. You made me sane. You started to give my puffy eyes a make-over. You even gave me a chance to meet my own Nap Time every few days.

How I loved you. How we loved you.

But you only stayed for two months. You came and stole our hearts and then you took off.

What was it about my son’s four-month birthday that turned you off? Was it the drool? The tooth? The new sitting-up-trick?

Was it the massive growth spurt? The immunizations? The constant rolling-over? Were you angry because we took away the swaddle? (Come on, you know it was time.) Did the unbelievable cuteness become too much to handle anymore?

Or is this just a conspiracy between you and God to make me pray more? (It’s working you cheeky Nap Time!)

I’ve gone ‘round and ‘round and can make no sense of your departure. I just don’t understand why you left. You had it so good here with our happy little family. I set the mood for you. I honored your time table. I gave you consistency. And yes, I realize you’ve been back since then… but only for fleeting visits. You have been such a tease these last six weeks.

When did this relationship get so toxic? So one-sided? So unpredictable? So shaky at best?

You want the truth? Here it is: I think it’s grossly unfair that I have to walk on eggshells and cater to your every whim.

Where’s the give and take? Where’s the mutual respect?

And now you’ve left again… and I hate you for it.

Except that I still love you. I do. I really, really do. (Is this what they would call a co-dependency?)

If you would come back, I would take you in a heartbeat. But I want you to come back and stay. Move in. Unpack your bags and change your address. What must I do to convince you that you belong here? This is your home.

Is it immaturity that makes you so fickle? I don’t understand why you constantly come and go. Your commitment issues are a concern to me. Why don’t you just move in and stay forever? Or could you at least stay until my sweet boy is a bit older? Like maybe four? (That’s only three-and-a-half more years!) Surely it’s not too much to ask.

I promise we’ll make you comfortable here. I’ll draw the curtains. I’ll turn on the fan. I’ll even play music if that’s what you wish.

But please, oh pluh-leeeeese Nap Time, won’t you come back to us?

We’re lost without you. We’re tired. We’re grumpy. We’re teary. We have a short attention span and a failing memory. Our kitchen floor is covered in crumbs and our laundry is overflowing. The bags under our eyes are back and no doubt our blood pressure has climbed.

This just isn’t good for us.

If we’ve done something to offend you – tell me! We’ll undo it! We’ll make it up to you! I promise we’ll do everything in our power to make you want to stay this time.

Nap Time, I really do love you. I’m sorry I said “I hate you”. I didn’t mean it. Forgive me! I love you. We love you. We neeeeeeeed you.

The key is under the mat. You know where your room is.

Nap Time, please make haste!

Waiting in hope and a slight bit of panic,
levi & mommy

 

 

About Author

Adriel Booker is an author, speaker, and advocate based in Sydney, Australia who believes storytelling, beauty, and the grace of God will change the world. Adriel has become a trusted voice in areas of motherhood and parenting, Christian spirituality, and global women's issues. She's also known for her work with the Love A Mama Collective—serving under-resourced women in developing nations through safe birth initiatives—as well as her years spent as a Bible teacher and leadership coach. Her latest book is Grace Like Scarlett: Grieving with Hope after Miscarriage and Loss and she's made the companion grief journal available for free. Find Adriel across all social media platforms at @adrielbooker or sign up for LoveNotes, Adriel's 'secret posts' that aren't published anywhere else online. ✌️

24 Comments

  • Shonda
    11 July 2010 at 5:33 pm

    I'm not sure how you do naps, but I put my son down at the SAME time every day and get him up at the SAME time everyday and I NEVER have a problem. He sleeps and talks to himself and is always happy. I have a very strict schedule that has worked since about 2 months old and he's now 19 months with one nice long 2.5-3 hour nap everyday. Hope you get a nap time for your son and for you! Your Levi is a doll!

    Reply
  • Funky Mama Bird
    11 July 2010 at 5:37 pm

    I hate when nap time gets messed up. Maybe he's ready for fewer naps? I think G went from four to three naps around 4 months, and then three to two naps at 7 months. He just went down one nap yesterday and that was the hardest of them all!

    Reply
  • Cameron
    11 July 2010 at 5:38 pm

    Isis did this same thing right around 4 months. Hers lasted about 3 weeks real bad & then slooooowly got better. She woke up at night & all kinds of things around that point. I think it's the growth & everything that just makes their bodies go all wonky at that point. But she started getting a little better – I tried to stay as consistent as possible. Around 6 months – almost exactly at 6 months – she started taking longer naps. Like one day, I just put her down for her 2nd nap & she slept for an hour & a half. I was like, "um, ok…" & then she just kept doing it! I've heard from several people that they get a little more consistent or a little better around 6 months, so just stay as consistent as you can & I really do think he'll get back to normal!

    If not – troubleshoot! I tried a few different things around 5 months, too. They might've helped, but it didn't seem like it at the time. I could go through what I did, but it's a much longer message.

    Reply
  • Cameron
    11 July 2010 at 5:40 pm

    P.S. I really like your new layout & everything! Looks great with the 2 bars on the right side!

    Reply
  • Natalie
    11 July 2010 at 5:45 pm

    Oh, I feel your pain. And I love that you beg nap time to come back…I have done it too!

    Sounds like maybe it's time to cut out a nap? It sucks, it's hard work, and he'll be miserable for a few days until he learns the new schedule, but then you'll get your "me" time back 🙂

    Reply
  • The Planet Pink
    11 July 2010 at 7:45 pm

    Just hang in there! Sleep is a fickle one – just when you've got him cornered he slips out the back door! It WILL get better…. and then it will get worse…. and then it will get better again. Rinse and repeat. LOL

    Reply
  • Lori
    11 July 2010 at 9:02 pm

    This post seriously made me laugh out loud. My baby has never been a good napper. She was awesome as a newborn, but ever since 3 months +, it's been downhill.

    I'm your newest follower. Love your blog!
    http://penelopeblue.blogspot.com/

    Reply
  • Hannah
    11 July 2010 at 10:39 pm

    Oh nap time it has been awhile since you have been a consistent visitor in our home too! I feel your pain, we have had the same problem for months now! I hope they come back and stay!

    Reply
  • The Aussie Mommy
    11 July 2010 at 11:06 pm

    Ummm… ADORE this post… and that first picture of Levi. Can I please have a bite of him??? You've done an amazing job doing all the right things and if nap time doesn't honour you, well Levi definitely will!! Your love and commitment (and humour) to him is undeniable! (prov 31:28)

    And besides, now that you've said all this, nap time probably will come rolling right back in (if it already hasn't!). Its ironic like that.

    Thanks for giving the rest of us mommies a little laugh and deep sigh of relief! 🙂

    Reply
  • Jessica Anne
    11 July 2010 at 11:38 pm

    Oh nap time, how I miss it too. It still comes regularly around for my 2 year old, a little less regularly for my 8 mo old, but it has been 9 mos since it has visited my 4 yr old. 9 very long months. Be patient, nap time will come around if you continue to coax it. For a few years anyway. 🙂

    Reply
  • cooperl788
    12 July 2010 at 12:44 am

    I hate to say this, but it could be the start of the 4-month wakeful period. I don't know why it happens but it seems like everybody's kid at my mom group went through this. Georgia went through this for 2 months, and then went right back to 2 naps per day at 6 months. So there's hope! Try to keep him to the schedule, even if you just let hime lay there awake for 20 minutes until you go get him. And know, this too shall pass!

    Reply
  • Mel
    12 July 2010 at 12:47 am

    By far my favorite post. And totally relatable.

    Reply
  • Mommycrat
    12 July 2010 at 1:45 am

    Ah! My baby is a bit of a sporatic napper – at nine months she usually goes for a morning nap and an afternoon nap – but not always – sometimes she just skips it completely and I feel robbed. Totally robbed.

    So feeling your pain. Great post – and I love the new layout 🙂

    Reply
  • Amy Sullivan
    12 July 2010 at 3:50 am

    Sleep will come…I promise. Although, as I write this I have a feeling I will be wishing for sleep as I fear my little one will make her 3rd night of 2:00 am appearances a habit. YIKES!

    Reply
  • Lori Vernon
    12 July 2010 at 4:58 am

    Ironically enough, my post was going to be EXACTLY what the other Lori wrote. 4 Months is when we started having sleep issues, too. My little one refused to go to sleep unless breastfeeding in the sling! (I know, I know, bad habits, but at least she slept!)

    Good luck! Parenting is all about waiting out the difficult phases!

    Reply
  • Christy
    12 July 2010 at 10:36 am

    lol, I get more naps that most moms I think, but only because Tyler can't sleep without me by his side. Even at night, I have to lay with him till he falls asleep then sneak out and eventually come back when he wakes up in the middle of the night. Still trying to figure out a way to nip that one in the bud. It is helpful during his afternoon naps though, Oh darn, I need to get this laundry folded but Tyler needs to nap so I guess I do too, 😉

    Reply
  • HRH Mommy
    12 July 2010 at 10:11 pm

    Oh my goodness!! When Nap Time returns, could you ask him to send his twin over this direction? Kai has always been our monster sleeper (11 hours at night, 3 for nap time). Nap is gone though. Have no idea where the heck it went. And Ryder….well, he's still learning to get acquainted with Nap Time, but they have a love-hate relationship as well. All I can say is "Mommy, keep at it!!" Some day it will return. You WILL win this battle!"

    Reply
  • HRH Mommy
    12 July 2010 at 10:19 pm

    By the way, I LOVE LOVE LOVE these pics!!

    Reply
  • adriel, from the mommyhood memos
    13 July 2010 at 4:59 am

    i have to say… since posting this letter we've had two of the best nap days in ages!!!! whoever thought i'd be giving kudos to the postal system?! somebody did something right cause this letter was RECEIVED. can i get an amen? oh glory!

    Reply
  • Anonymous
    13 July 2010 at 7:08 am

    SO stinkin funny! Justin and I were both laughing out loud as we were reading it.

    Reply
  • Anna
    13 July 2010 at 7:25 am

    oh, i'm feelin' ya Adriel. Nap time has been the most unpredictable relationship of the year for the Lifsey family. Love what you said about the conspiracy – two things that have developed since I've become acquainted with nap time…more of a prayer life (although most of the time I'm convinced the Lord is punishing me, so my motives are a bit shaky…hehe) and I somehow all of a sudden have adopted a belief in superstition. When nap time is on vacation or off being irresponsible and neglecting us, I pray…hard and ridiculous prayers. When nap time is around, I don't want to admit that it really is here because I don't want to "jinx" it. Ha – motherhood has done some doosies on my sanity, but it keeps me on my toes and usually always brings me back to the reality that God is still seated on His throne in heaven, even when my baby is cranky and awake when he should be snoozle mcdoozling.

    thanks for the post. 🙂

    Reply
  • grupni popusti
    4 July 2012 at 8:00 pm

    Oh my goodness! an amazing article dude. Thank you

    Reply
  • Struja
    4 July 2012 at 8:07 pm

    Oh my goodness! an amazing article dude. Thank you
    Struja

    Reply
  • Lesley J. Smith
    24 October 2012 at 4:29 pm

    These are some of the pains of being a mom. But the kid, it’s a joy.
    Lesley J. Smith recently posted..Find a School for Bartending in Winfield, West Virginia, WVMy Profile

    Reply

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