A woman’s lament regarding post partum hair loss.
Hair, hair, all over the place
Those long dark locks are now a disgrace
Prenatal pills gave them a nice boost
But now there’s just more of them to lose
By the handful they’re coming out
Enough to make a grown woman pout
Once thick and lush, now thin and weak
Those hairs are departing, the outlook is bleak.
Weaved through socks and clogging the drain
Taking over the house and assaulting my brain
Baked into muffins and mixed into dip
And ALWAYS stuck to the gloss on my lips
In baby’s neck rolls and wrapped around toes
I’m just hoping they’re not up his nose
Found one in my armpit and a few in my bra
And gagged when I sucked one right through a straw
The situation’s bad, it’s causing us grief
I’m waiting for the day this madness will cease
Please God please, wasn’t birth enough
Without having to endure this awful stuff?
The work of a mother is thankless yet noble
But this hair loss stuff is sure causing me trouble
I’m losing my mind as much as my hair
This really does seem so entirely unfair
I’m tired of wading through hair all around
This post-partum hair loss is beating me down
So rescue me now, make the crazy stop
End the Great Shed before I give it the CHOP
Dear friends, five weeks and counting. Please tell me the Great Post Partum Shed will be over soon.